So today after another very busy day, I am resting on the couch and Kauy crawls up there (sits on top of me) and says: "Mom, do you ever get board of education?" I laughed. I laughed some more then said...you bet and sometimes I get board with the board of education.
We have started something new at our house this week. I have decided that I will pay bucks NOT to have to pick up at night....NOT to have to repeat myself...NOT to have to remind them to brush and flush (you read correctly)...and NOT to have to stay in Kauy's room until he is completely asleep. So here is the plan:
1. I wrote up a contract for each. I love the first sentence. It reads: "I understand that by living in this household, I HAVE to share in the responsibilities." It goes on to say that they understand the idea of an allowance. We sat down, read through it, discussed it and signed on the solid line.
2. I listed the chores for each of them. My favorite...."Complete a request from an adult without going to a 3rd request. In other words, do it the first time."
3. I then listed the consequences. One of which is loss of any toys left in the living room/ dining room/ bathroom for two weeks.
4. I listed the rewards. I worked from one week, to two weeks, one month, and finally 2 months. Culminating with a trip out of town. One week = trip to Prime time and I pay for one activity for the week.
5. Now in order to work, I created some pieces of paper. 4 say $.50 and about 6 say $1.oo.
I taped these to the top of their door frame. IF they break a rule, I don't say a word but just walk in and take one off the frame. Starting with a $.50. What is left at the end of the week is theirs for allowance. Tonight I had to take one from each of them because "Tool Time" was fun and they weren't in a get a shower mode. Oops...too bad for you! I caught Makaley checking the door frame in Kauy's room and then going to check hers. All I said was..."I asked 3 times for you to shower." BUT....she didn't stomp or huff off because she didn't want to loose the next $.50. They can also use the allowance to purchase toys back earlier than two weeks if they choose to.
Now my predictions? Well, this will be work for me to remember stick to the rules no matter how it hurts them or me. I will have to pay up. It will do great for about 2 weeks, then I probably won't fork out much allowance. I even thought about making some of those money strips in red. If they loose all of their allowance money before Sunday night, then I put up red ones which mean you owe me! Ha Ha Ha Of course we are reading this great book about a 12 year old who earned $58,000 in just a couple of months. They are both into saving and seeing who can get there first.
So, check with me in a month. See how we did. I would love for them to prove me wrong!!!!!
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
The Best is all you can be!
It was my first day dealing with the pressure of my new job. Hello? What was I thinking? Without going into detail I will just say that there were more kids than floor space in a couple of math classes; some kids had an extra helping of language arts or math; some were on the wrong campus (and some of those didn't understand Eng. or Spanish but were precious and patient); some don't like the classes they are in; and some just didn't want to be there..end of discussion. Of course I took it upon myself to decide that it was all my fault. I decided that I had dyslexia and transposed class numbers, or I was talking and not paying attention, or I decided that kid needed more Grammar! Then after pouring my thoughts out to others I decided that my co-counselor could be right.........there was a little problem with some class numbers that were not our problem.
I found myself trying to be perfect for everyone. I didn't want to make a mistake. I needed to be just perfect and a total success. I didn't want anyone to second guess the choice made to move me into the office. I soon found myself asking.......do I try that hard for my family? Some would say not on a daily basis. More importantly do I try that hard for God? The creator! The one who gave me the fingers that put those numbers into the computer! The one who gave me the ability to work with students! The one who blessed me with 2 very precious children! Do I give Him my "very best try"? On a daily basis?
Today there were a number of students who were enrolled on our campus that spoke either not a stitch of English, or a very limited amount. A majority of those don't speak the only other language I can speak....Spanish. There they were. There they stood in their "new" clothes carrying a binder or backpack, ready to meet a world they don't understand. Yet, they tried. Today they were coming as the "best" their parents had to send us. They would give their best in actions today also. They were patient with me, the one who could only smile and try to reassure them that we would take care of them. There are plenty of people in our world who are in the same situation. Not just those who don't understand the language I speak, but those who do and I don't speak to them. They are the "lost" of this world. Not just the young ones who are lost and can not find their way around the campus. I need to give my best. Even when the numbers don't match, the phone is ringing, the coaches need another schedule change, someone doesn't want to play clarinet, the parent who rubs everyone the wrong way is standing in my door, I need to give my best. I am a representative of a place like no other. The king there doesn't ask for perfection, just my best. The best is all I can be. So, tomorrow I will try again.
I found myself trying to be perfect for everyone. I didn't want to make a mistake. I needed to be just perfect and a total success. I didn't want anyone to second guess the choice made to move me into the office. I soon found myself asking.......do I try that hard for my family? Some would say not on a daily basis. More importantly do I try that hard for God? The creator! The one who gave me the fingers that put those numbers into the computer! The one who gave me the ability to work with students! The one who blessed me with 2 very precious children! Do I give Him my "very best try"? On a daily basis?
Today there were a number of students who were enrolled on our campus that spoke either not a stitch of English, or a very limited amount. A majority of those don't speak the only other language I can speak....Spanish. There they were. There they stood in their "new" clothes carrying a binder or backpack, ready to meet a world they don't understand. Yet, they tried. Today they were coming as the "best" their parents had to send us. They would give their best in actions today also. They were patient with me, the one who could only smile and try to reassure them that we would take care of them. There are plenty of people in our world who are in the same situation. Not just those who don't understand the language I speak, but those who do and I don't speak to them. They are the "lost" of this world. Not just the young ones who are lost and can not find their way around the campus. I need to give my best. Even when the numbers don't match, the phone is ringing, the coaches need another schedule change, someone doesn't want to play clarinet, the parent who rubs everyone the wrong way is standing in my door, I need to give my best. I am a representative of a place like no other. The king there doesn't ask for perfection, just my best. The best is all I can be. So, tomorrow I will try again.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Reasons to "rejoice and be glad"
You know that you are behind on blogging when one of your avid readers comes to your house, gets right up in your face and tells you that she is tried of reading about the same thing for the past 2 weeks. Sorry Suzie!
I had decided to write about another book I just finished reading but......I have something else to write about today. Well, several things come to my mind that I just want to get on my soap box and share. Hang tight. I am not sure where God will take us as we go along, but here we go.
Reasons to celebrate the day and "rejoice in it":
10. Kauy is well. Not only is he well, he is so well that he is driving me crazy with wellness. He has packed on some pounds since this trip to the hospital. He and his "big" went out on Friday night. When they arrived home the chased geckos. We now have a gecko farm! Last night I was out in the cool of the evening with a flashlight digging for little insects to feed the seven geckos we have in the container! Aren't I all that and a bowl of cheerios! ha ha
9. Makaley cleaned a corner of her room! That is a challenge in itself! I was hoping for more, but sometimes we take what we can get. She and I did have a very fun Friday evening while Kauy was with the "bigs". It was neat!
8. It is tax-free weekend and I did NOT go out shopping! Can you believe it? I am proud of me! Of course the day is not over, but if I should go out to purchase, it will be the only time this weekend. NOT a daily trip! More than likely I will not buy clothing. (My rear has gotten so big that you have to add an extra 'u' or two to spell the word butt! more like "buuutt" )
7. It is raining here. I mean really raining. It is also very cool! Below 80 I think. My parents received 5 inches Sat. morning between 4AM and 7AM. I picked up 2 1/2, but today there is a grand total of 3 1/2 inches in the gauge, and we are expecting more today and tomorrow. Which leads me to #6
6. We played outside in the rain. No umbrellas...just good refreshing cold rain on the hair and skin. Well, my play was different from the kids, but they thought that was the coolest thing in the world. No lightening right now, so I just let them go wild.
5. I have started my new job, and it is going fine. I often feel like I am starring in a movie as the leading lady because things are so different than teaching in the classroom. Being on the other side of the door is just interesting. I have prayed this week that God will use me to do what He needs accomplished, but I have also reassured myself that God doesn't make mistakes, and never leads us into a situation we aren't prepared for. Which leads me to #4
4. Our sermon today was about hands. We studied the lines in our hands. I am living in a fake world. I didn't realize until today how many aging lines are in my hands. Hello.........I have lived over 1/2 of my life span already. How can that be....I feel only 30. The end of the sermon was basically asking: How much of your week are you willing to put into God's hands? How much of your week are you willing to give to Him? Just today? Just Monday morning? Just Sunday and Wed.? Then he had us take out a writing pen and open our hands. We were to write on our hands the answer to those questions. Just like our names are written on His Heart, I am able to see my promise to Him on my hands. AND....if it washes off, I will still look and remember because I was the one that wrote it on something that I can't throw away. I won't tell you what I wrote, but my son wrote the same. We had a discussion about what he was doing and what he would be responsible for. I challenge you, IF you were unable to be with us at church, to do the same. Write on your hand how much of your life you want to give to God. He gave it all to us. Think of the things you have done with your hands over the years? Have you been giving or grabbing? He closed with the a quote from a friend of his. "I have never regretted giving." Have you? And that just leads me to #3, 2, and 1 !!!
#3, 2 and 1.....reasons to "rejoice in the day and to be glad in it".....My friend Suzie did come to my house. She did tell me to get on with the writing. She did spend the night. BUT..she did something that has kept me very, I don't know what to call it, over joyed? over whelmed? quiet? pensive? I am truly at a loss for that word. She arrived on Friday night. Unloading her truck, she handed me her jewelry box. I looked at her rather strangely and she just said that we would play. After showing her our new geckos, telling stories, and all the "bed time" rituals, we finally had time alone to visit. She opened her jewelry box and the other boxes she brought with her. Inside that elegant box was some beautiful jewelry. Some worth lots and some just "fun". That just didn't matter because you see, it contained her mom's things. You have read about my "other mother".....Mama Becky. Suzie brought them because she wanted to share them with me. There are no words to tell you what that meant to me. Suzie is an only child in birth only. We are more sisters than friends, but to be asked to share in something so special was beyond my wildest thoughts. I loved (still do love) Becky. I still get that lump in my throat when I think of her, and there are so many times I need to ask her a question that no other person could answer. There are many widows in this world, but Becky would listen to me and not judge me. She would listen(read my emails) while I told her everything my breaking heart held, and she would guide me...not tell me, but just give me some guidance. What a wonderful woman. Suzie and I enjoyed our playing in the jewelry box. She told me about some of the rings, a family pin, this or that item. She and her mom had matching bracelets (breast cancer charm bracelets). Now Suzie and I have matching breast cancer charm bracelets. She shared a few little stories, and we talked. I don't know how to say it. It's not the material things Suzie gave me. It's not the value. It's the "FAMILY" It's the honor. It's the blessing of giving. Thank you Suzie for making my weekend! Thank you for the honor you gave to me! Thank you God for giving us Becky!
Now, not only did she surprise me with the necklaces and earrings, but she also came in with this nice big box. It said something about Barbies on it, and I was in a panic. I had just threatened to toss some Barbies if they didn't get put into a drawer! Leave it to Suzie. There was no Barbie. There was the BROWN LAMP! Susan probably has more to say about that lamp than I do. All my years of knowing Susan and Becky, there was this lamp that sat on the end table at their house. I knew that I was at my second "home" no matter where we were because there was "the lamp". So, the brown lamp now sits in my dining room. Waiting for its place. The place that it always has.....letting you know you are at home, with family, safe and secure!
Oh and as a bonus today...........we actually found a " blue moon marshmallow" in the cereal box today. I know that there were "yellow stars, green clovers, purple horseshoes and blue moons" in there when I bought the box. Hmmmmmmm maybe I should say that Kauy has put on marshmallows instead of pounds.
I had decided to write about another book I just finished reading but......I have something else to write about today. Well, several things come to my mind that I just want to get on my soap box and share. Hang tight. I am not sure where God will take us as we go along, but here we go.
Reasons to celebrate the day and "rejoice in it":
10. Kauy is well. Not only is he well, he is so well that he is driving me crazy with wellness. He has packed on some pounds since this trip to the hospital. He and his "big" went out on Friday night. When they arrived home the chased geckos. We now have a gecko farm! Last night I was out in the cool of the evening with a flashlight digging for little insects to feed the seven geckos we have in the container! Aren't I all that and a bowl of cheerios! ha ha
9. Makaley cleaned a corner of her room! That is a challenge in itself! I was hoping for more, but sometimes we take what we can get. She and I did have a very fun Friday evening while Kauy was with the "bigs". It was neat!
8. It is tax-free weekend and I did NOT go out shopping! Can you believe it? I am proud of me! Of course the day is not over, but if I should go out to purchase, it will be the only time this weekend. NOT a daily trip! More than likely I will not buy clothing. (My rear has gotten so big that you have to add an extra 'u' or two to spell the word butt! more like "buuutt" )
7. It is raining here. I mean really raining. It is also very cool! Below 80 I think. My parents received 5 inches Sat. morning between 4AM and 7AM. I picked up 2 1/2, but today there is a grand total of 3 1/2 inches in the gauge, and we are expecting more today and tomorrow. Which leads me to #6
6. We played outside in the rain. No umbrellas...just good refreshing cold rain on the hair and skin. Well, my play was different from the kids, but they thought that was the coolest thing in the world. No lightening right now, so I just let them go wild.
5. I have started my new job, and it is going fine. I often feel like I am starring in a movie as the leading lady because things are so different than teaching in the classroom. Being on the other side of the door is just interesting. I have prayed this week that God will use me to do what He needs accomplished, but I have also reassured myself that God doesn't make mistakes, and never leads us into a situation we aren't prepared for. Which leads me to #4
4. Our sermon today was about hands. We studied the lines in our hands. I am living in a fake world. I didn't realize until today how many aging lines are in my hands. Hello.........I have lived over 1/2 of my life span already. How can that be....I feel only 30. The end of the sermon was basically asking: How much of your week are you willing to put into God's hands? How much of your week are you willing to give to Him? Just today? Just Monday morning? Just Sunday and Wed.? Then he had us take out a writing pen and open our hands. We were to write on our hands the answer to those questions. Just like our names are written on His Heart, I am able to see my promise to Him on my hands. AND....if it washes off, I will still look and remember because I was the one that wrote it on something that I can't throw away. I won't tell you what I wrote, but my son wrote the same. We had a discussion about what he was doing and what he would be responsible for. I challenge you, IF you were unable to be with us at church, to do the same. Write on your hand how much of your life you want to give to God. He gave it all to us. Think of the things you have done with your hands over the years? Have you been giving or grabbing? He closed with the a quote from a friend of his. "I have never regretted giving." Have you? And that just leads me to #3, 2, and 1 !!!
#3, 2 and 1.....reasons to "rejoice in the day and to be glad in it".....My friend Suzie did come to my house. She did tell me to get on with the writing. She did spend the night. BUT..she did something that has kept me very, I don't know what to call it, over joyed? over whelmed? quiet? pensive? I am truly at a loss for that word. She arrived on Friday night. Unloading her truck, she handed me her jewelry box. I looked at her rather strangely and she just said that we would play. After showing her our new geckos, telling stories, and all the "bed time" rituals, we finally had time alone to visit. She opened her jewelry box and the other boxes she brought with her. Inside that elegant box was some beautiful jewelry. Some worth lots and some just "fun". That just didn't matter because you see, it contained her mom's things. You have read about my "other mother".....Mama Becky. Suzie brought them because she wanted to share them with me. There are no words to tell you what that meant to me. Suzie is an only child in birth only. We are more sisters than friends, but to be asked to share in something so special was beyond my wildest thoughts. I loved (still do love) Becky. I still get that lump in my throat when I think of her, and there are so many times I need to ask her a question that no other person could answer. There are many widows in this world, but Becky would listen to me and not judge me. She would listen(read my emails) while I told her everything my breaking heart held, and she would guide me...not tell me, but just give me some guidance. What a wonderful woman. Suzie and I enjoyed our playing in the jewelry box. She told me about some of the rings, a family pin, this or that item. She and her mom had matching bracelets (breast cancer charm bracelets). Now Suzie and I have matching breast cancer charm bracelets. She shared a few little stories, and we talked. I don't know how to say it. It's not the material things Suzie gave me. It's not the value. It's the "FAMILY" It's the honor. It's the blessing of giving. Thank you Suzie for making my weekend! Thank you for the honor you gave to me! Thank you God for giving us Becky!
Now, not only did she surprise me with the necklaces and earrings, but she also came in with this nice big box. It said something about Barbies on it, and I was in a panic. I had just threatened to toss some Barbies if they didn't get put into a drawer! Leave it to Suzie. There was no Barbie. There was the BROWN LAMP! Susan probably has more to say about that lamp than I do. All my years of knowing Susan and Becky, there was this lamp that sat on the end table at their house. I knew that I was at my second "home" no matter where we were because there was "the lamp". So, the brown lamp now sits in my dining room. Waiting for its place. The place that it always has.....letting you know you are at home, with family, safe and secure!
Oh and as a bonus today...........we actually found a " blue moon marshmallow" in the cereal box today. I know that there were "yellow stars, green clovers, purple horseshoes and blue moons" in there when I bought the box. Hmmmmmmm maybe I should say that Kauy has put on marshmallows instead of pounds.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
It was today!
And so you ask many questions in those emails I get from you so I am going to tell you what I can tell you ....about today!
Let's get to the children first:
Today was Zoo day for them with my parents. It was a perfect day because they went in the morning and it rained this afternoon! Yep. Who cares if this side of town got only enough to make the concrete look really wet! It was water......it fell.......it nourished.......and it didn't reach 100 today!
Today Miss M. practiced her piano which she should have been practicing all summer long. She has a really neat song and did a great job of it. I don't brag on her enough. She is a great musician, artist,photographer, student, swimmer, and just an all around wonderful girl. Problem is????? She is too much like her mother, and two of me in one household is, well, it is just too much of me! There in is the reason that I think "the man" loves his apartment! He can get away for "me" there! Don't blame him!
Today, Mr. Kauy went for a follow up the Dr. Rob.....the doctor. Okay, for those of you waiting (Nita and Susan) we didn't go last Friday. It was my last day of summer vacation so I decided to take the kids swimming. We swam for about 8 min. before we had to get out of the pool because of thunder. We got back into the pool, and then thunder rumbled again so we got out again. Back into the pool for about 3 min. (long enough for me to get my hair wet swimming to the rope) and the lightening started. Didn't know that I had that affect on the weather. Guess my body in a bathing suit was just too much for Mother Nature! So...I paid $10 for it to rain on our swim party. BUT........we went to "happy hour"....ordered ice cream and 1/2 price diet coke with vanilla, and went to visit Aunt "T". Now anyway, back to the visit today: It was wonderful for many reasons which I will just list for you.
#1. It was raining on us when we got there...needed the rain.
#2. We were in and out in less than an hour.
#3. While we were waiting, Kauy decided to read a book to me. He chose Curious George. Guys, he can read. I was soooooo proud of him. Of course in his "Kauy fashion", he would stop between the pages and say something like "Please enjoy our very own elevator music while you wait for the next page. Operators are standing by." Then I would get tired of his "music" he was humming and say "And now back to our regularly scheduled program which is already in progress" and he would read some more. On his own. Because of his own desire to read aloud to me!!! You don't know how happy I was.
#4. Dr. Rob was back from Africa! Last week Kauy's sed. rate was down to 14. It started at 35 which believe it or not is within normal range. Thus, the reason this baffled the doctors. Rob said that 15 is where we want it. So.......you do the math! We are there.
#5. Two more weeks of medication.
#6. No more blood tests.
#7. No more doctor's appointments.
#8. Life goes on as normal. Whatever that is!
#9. It was sprinkling when we got out
#10. We made it in time for happy hour at Sonic.
Now.........for those who will ask (you know I know you!), after we stop with the medication, we should be good to go. Can't tell me that we will never have this happen again, but we know how he acts/responds/feels to this infection, so we know what to look for. Also (quit wondering...I am getting there) after we stop the meds., IF we have no pain, limping, or fever, then we are good to go. Rob said that we would know within 2 to 4 weeks after finishing the medication, and for me just to be observant. Since we attend church with 4 of the people who dealt with him and had seen him before the hospital visit, I feel pretty sure they will notice anything IF I don't! But be assured, I WILL watch him like a hawk. You know, I understand that saying. Once Kelly was combining and asked me to bring supper and ride with him (actually he wanted to drive and me hand feed him). Anyway, as we were combining, this hawk swooped down in front of the header, and the took off. It was one of those "it took only a moment" type things. BUT in that time he had spotted a mouse we had routed out of his hiding in the tall wheat, swooped down, grabbed it and took off again. That is "watching like a hawk" and I promise to swoop on top of anything that doesn't seem right! And by the way...that story was free of charge. Better than homemade elevator music!
Also, today was great because..........it was today. God gave us another day with rain. A break from the 100 weather. AND.....He has given me a job that I am enjoying. We have worked so hard this week. I hope I can find time before school starts to get my room decorated and organized. If not, we will have school with boxes in my room. I will label them as chairs, and one as a table. Parents will just have to move if I need something in the box they are sitting on. I will just throw some squares of paper towels on the boxes for cushions. BUT so far....the verdict is that I am glad I sat still and listened to the voice of God. Glad to make this move. Glad to have a family that lead me to a faith that would allow me to trust God at this time (age) in my life to make a change! It was today and I don't think I even worried about tomorrow once! Now, for me that is a change. Ask anyone who knows me.
So, that is today. It was today. It was a good today.
Let's get to the children first:
Today was Zoo day for them with my parents. It was a perfect day because they went in the morning and it rained this afternoon! Yep. Who cares if this side of town got only enough to make the concrete look really wet! It was water......it fell.......it nourished.......and it didn't reach 100 today!
Today Miss M. practiced her piano which she should have been practicing all summer long. She has a really neat song and did a great job of it. I don't brag on her enough. She is a great musician, artist,photographer, student, swimmer, and just an all around wonderful girl. Problem is????? She is too much like her mother, and two of me in one household is, well, it is just too much of me! There in is the reason that I think "the man" loves his apartment! He can get away for "me" there! Don't blame him!
Today, Mr. Kauy went for a follow up the Dr. Rob.....the doctor. Okay, for those of you waiting (Nita and Susan) we didn't go last Friday. It was my last day of summer vacation so I decided to take the kids swimming. We swam for about 8 min. before we had to get out of the pool because of thunder. We got back into the pool, and then thunder rumbled again so we got out again. Back into the pool for about 3 min. (long enough for me to get my hair wet swimming to the rope) and the lightening started. Didn't know that I had that affect on the weather. Guess my body in a bathing suit was just too much for Mother Nature! So...I paid $10 for it to rain on our swim party. BUT........we went to "happy hour"....ordered ice cream and 1/2 price diet coke with vanilla, and went to visit Aunt "T". Now anyway, back to the visit today: It was wonderful for many reasons which I will just list for you.
#1. It was raining on us when we got there...needed the rain.
#2. We were in and out in less than an hour.
#3. While we were waiting, Kauy decided to read a book to me. He chose Curious George. Guys, he can read. I was soooooo proud of him. Of course in his "Kauy fashion", he would stop between the pages and say something like "Please enjoy our very own elevator music while you wait for the next page. Operators are standing by." Then I would get tired of his "music" he was humming and say "And now back to our regularly scheduled program which is already in progress" and he would read some more. On his own. Because of his own desire to read aloud to me!!! You don't know how happy I was.
#4. Dr. Rob was back from Africa! Last week Kauy's sed. rate was down to 14. It started at 35 which believe it or not is within normal range. Thus, the reason this baffled the doctors. Rob said that 15 is where we want it. So.......you do the math! We are there.
#5. Two more weeks of medication.
#6. No more blood tests.
#7. No more doctor's appointments.
#8. Life goes on as normal. Whatever that is!
#9. It was sprinkling when we got out
#10. We made it in time for happy hour at Sonic.
Now.........for those who will ask (you know I know you!), after we stop with the medication, we should be good to go. Can't tell me that we will never have this happen again, but we know how he acts/responds/feels to this infection, so we know what to look for. Also (quit wondering...I am getting there) after we stop the meds., IF we have no pain, limping, or fever, then we are good to go. Rob said that we would know within 2 to 4 weeks after finishing the medication, and for me just to be observant. Since we attend church with 4 of the people who dealt with him and had seen him before the hospital visit, I feel pretty sure they will notice anything IF I don't! But be assured, I WILL watch him like a hawk. You know, I understand that saying. Once Kelly was combining and asked me to bring supper and ride with him (actually he wanted to drive and me hand feed him). Anyway, as we were combining, this hawk swooped down in front of the header, and the took off. It was one of those "it took only a moment" type things. BUT in that time he had spotted a mouse we had routed out of his hiding in the tall wheat, swooped down, grabbed it and took off again. That is "watching like a hawk" and I promise to swoop on top of anything that doesn't seem right! And by the way...that story was free of charge. Better than homemade elevator music!
Also, today was great because..........it was today. God gave us another day with rain. A break from the 100 weather. AND.....He has given me a job that I am enjoying. We have worked so hard this week. I hope I can find time before school starts to get my room decorated and organized. If not, we will have school with boxes in my room. I will label them as chairs, and one as a table. Parents will just have to move if I need something in the box they are sitting on. I will just throw some squares of paper towels on the boxes for cushions. BUT so far....the verdict is that I am glad I sat still and listened to the voice of God. Glad to make this move. Glad to have a family that lead me to a faith that would allow me to trust God at this time (age) in my life to make a change! It was today and I don't think I even worried about tomorrow once! Now, for me that is a change. Ask anyone who knows me.
So, that is today. It was today. It was a good today.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Do you "sprout a halo and play a harp?"
This summer I have not even read my usual 20 Bluebonnet Books, but hopefully I will get started on them soon. I have been able to get in a couple of children's books this summer. Both are super nad simple reads. The following thoughts come from a novel by Barbara Park entitled Mick Harte Was Here. I often find deep thoughts in "children's" books. (I use the quotations because these books are labeled as such only because of the reading level. Sometimes....my brain only gets it on that level.) It is these books that have that wonderful layered reading. You can read it lightly or get deeper into it. Yes, I even cried when reading this book. Sometimes I just have "a moment".
In this book, one of the main character,Mick, is killed in a bicycle accident. Mick's sister, Pheobe, is left with many questions and a life that is turned every which direction. I so understand how she feels about the people who visit, the way kids respond to her at school, and the way she deals with even her best friend or maybe I should say how her best friend deals with her. One of my favorite chapters is titled "Tap dancing on God's piano". The following is a portion of that chapter where Pheobe's friend Zoe is trying to help Pheobe, who wonders "Maybe there isn't a God at all, but says "I don't even want to go there", understand why this happened and what happens when you die:
"I've never thought much about heaven's specific location, okay? And anyway, the important thing is that heaven is where God is.
I rolled my eyes, "Yes, but that still doesn't tell me anything, Zoe. I mean what does it look like there? And what in the world do you do all day?
Things didn't get better. Zoe said, "You do God stuff."
My mouth practically dropped open with that one. "God stuff? What the heck is God stuff? You mean like right now you think Mick is reading Bible stories,and going around saying 'Peace be with you' and junk? Because that's a little hard to believe. Especially considering he got suspended from choir practice last year for tap dancing on the piano."
Zoe flopped back on her pillow. "Hey, I've got an idea. Why don't you just tell me what you want me to say, and I'll say it."
Don't you wonder about "God stuff?" How do kids see "God stuff"? How do we see "God stuff"?
The story goes on with Pheobe telling about her two grandmothers' theories about Mick's accident.
" My nana from Florida keeps saying this is all part of God's plan for Mick. And we're not allowed to question the plan, or think that maybe the plan stinks. We just accept it.
And my other grandmother says that God must have needed Mick more than we did. Only that what kind of a selfish God is that? To just snatch somebody away from the people who love him? Not to mention the fact that it's a little hard to believe that the most powerful being in the entire universe needs a seventh-grader who can't even program a VCR without screwing up the TV."
Zoe frowned in thought. "So, maybe your grandmothers are wrong," she said. "Maybe Mick's accident wasn't planned at all. Maybe it was a real, honest-to-goodness accident, and God is just as sad about it as everybody else."
Wow! I remember thinking that I hoped that God was as sad as I was....for me, Makaley, Kauy, my family, Kelly's family, but not sad for Kelly.
Phoebe continues:
"I swallowed hard, "Zo, I want so bad to know he's okay. But I keep trying to picture him in my head. And I can't. 'Cause I just don't know where to put him anymore."
Zoe reached out her arms to me. And when she did, I caved in. Totally, I mean. Sobbing out of control.
She rubbed my back and waited for the worst of it to be over. And the, out of thin air, these magical words came out of her mouth.
"Put him everywhere, why don't you?" She shrugged, "It just sort of came to me," she said. "But it makes sense, don't you think, Phoeb? Because like if God is everywhere they way they say he is, and Mick is with God, then Mick could be everywhere too."
For a second I couldn't even answer. I was still just so amazed, you know? At how right it felt.
Slowly, I leaned back on the couch and tried to let it all sink in.
I thought she (Zo) had fallen asleep, when I felt her tap me on the foot.
"Phoeb?"
"Yeah?"
"I could be wrong, you know. He could just be up in the clouds tap dancing on God's piano."
I hit her with my pillow.
That was it! I wanted to know that Kelly was okay. I wanted to know that I would be okay. I tried to see him in my head so often, but couldn't. I still have a hard time of getting it right. I don't understand death. Do we really know where those who have gone from this life are right now? I read...I listen...I study...I read some more. Here is the uncertain....the part we don't know all about....the part where our faith is written on the bouquet of flowers on the casket, the headstone, and our hearts. We have shelves in our garages to put our junk, closets to hold our clothes, scrapbooks to put memories, hearts to hold memories, but where do we put the one we loved that is no longer here? I, like Phoebe, have not really known where to "put" Kelly. He resides forever in my heart....in a ton of photos and videos, and in the faces, hands and feet of my children. SO I choose to put him everywhere!! Where do I put my great-grandmother? My grandparents, my Becky, and others? And so.........I choose to put them everywhere! The words from a children's book has given me that permission! I don't get all the "God stuff". I won't even tell you that I pretend to think I do. So today during a rain shower........they were all there.....running through the rain with us.
This book will be in my bookshelf in my new office. I will have a student one day who like me doesn't "get it" and I will pull out this book. Even IF I have to call him/her in and read for 15 min. to them, we will get through it and discuss this chapter. Of course, Makaley will read this next. Even if I have to read it to her.
In this book, one of the main character,Mick, is killed in a bicycle accident. Mick's sister, Pheobe, is left with many questions and a life that is turned every which direction. I so understand how she feels about the people who visit, the way kids respond to her at school, and the way she deals with even her best friend or maybe I should say how her best friend deals with her. One of my favorite chapters is titled "Tap dancing on God's piano". The following is a portion of that chapter where Pheobe's friend Zoe is trying to help Pheobe, who wonders "Maybe there isn't a God at all, but says "I don't even want to go there", understand why this happened and what happens when you die:
"I've never thought much about heaven's specific location, okay? And anyway, the important thing is that heaven is where God is.
I rolled my eyes, "Yes, but that still doesn't tell me anything, Zoe. I mean what does it look like there? And what in the world do you do all day?
Things didn't get better. Zoe said, "You do God stuff."
My mouth practically dropped open with that one. "God stuff? What the heck is God stuff? You mean like right now you think Mick is reading Bible stories,and going around saying 'Peace be with you' and junk? Because that's a little hard to believe. Especially considering he got suspended from choir practice last year for tap dancing on the piano."
Zoe flopped back on her pillow. "Hey, I've got an idea. Why don't you just tell me what you want me to say, and I'll say it."
Don't you wonder about "God stuff?" How do kids see "God stuff"? How do we see "God stuff"?
The story goes on with Pheobe telling about her two grandmothers' theories about Mick's accident.
" My nana from Florida keeps saying this is all part of God's plan for Mick. And we're not allowed to question the plan, or think that maybe the plan stinks. We just accept it.
And my other grandmother says that God must have needed Mick more than we did. Only that what kind of a selfish God is that? To just snatch somebody away from the people who love him? Not to mention the fact that it's a little hard to believe that the most powerful being in the entire universe needs a seventh-grader who can't even program a VCR without screwing up the TV."
Zoe frowned in thought. "So, maybe your grandmothers are wrong," she said. "Maybe Mick's accident wasn't planned at all. Maybe it was a real, honest-to-goodness accident, and God is just as sad about it as everybody else."
Wow! I remember thinking that I hoped that God was as sad as I was....for me, Makaley, Kauy, my family, Kelly's family, but not sad for Kelly.
Phoebe continues:
"I swallowed hard, "Zo, I want so bad to know he's okay. But I keep trying to picture him in my head. And I can't. 'Cause I just don't know where to put him anymore."
Zoe reached out her arms to me. And when she did, I caved in. Totally, I mean. Sobbing out of control.
She rubbed my back and waited for the worst of it to be over. And the, out of thin air, these magical words came out of her mouth.
"Put him everywhere, why don't you?" She shrugged, "It just sort of came to me," she said. "But it makes sense, don't you think, Phoeb? Because like if God is everywhere they way they say he is, and Mick is with God, then Mick could be everywhere too."
For a second I couldn't even answer. I was still just so amazed, you know? At how right it felt.
Slowly, I leaned back on the couch and tried to let it all sink in.
I thought she (Zo) had fallen asleep, when I felt her tap me on the foot.
"Phoeb?"
"Yeah?"
"I could be wrong, you know. He could just be up in the clouds tap dancing on God's piano."
I hit her with my pillow.
That was it! I wanted to know that Kelly was okay. I wanted to know that I would be okay. I tried to see him in my head so often, but couldn't. I still have a hard time of getting it right. I don't understand death. Do we really know where those who have gone from this life are right now? I read...I listen...I study...I read some more. Here is the uncertain....the part we don't know all about....the part where our faith is written on the bouquet of flowers on the casket, the headstone, and our hearts. We have shelves in our garages to put our junk, closets to hold our clothes, scrapbooks to put memories, hearts to hold memories, but where do we put the one we loved that is no longer here? I, like Phoebe, have not really known where to "put" Kelly. He resides forever in my heart....in a ton of photos and videos, and in the faces, hands and feet of my children. SO I choose to put him everywhere!! Where do I put my great-grandmother? My grandparents, my Becky, and others? And so.........I choose to put them everywhere! The words from a children's book has given me that permission! I don't get all the "God stuff". I won't even tell you that I pretend to think I do. So today during a rain shower........they were all there.....running through the rain with us.
This book will be in my bookshelf in my new office. I will have a student one day who like me doesn't "get it" and I will pull out this book. Even IF I have to call him/her in and read for 15 min. to them, we will get through it and discuss this chapter. Of course, Makaley will read this next. Even if I have to read it to her.
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