Another moment in motherhood

So, she turned eleven, and oh my goodness.
Tuesday night I send my daughter to take her shower and wash her hair. She calls to me in a whimpering voice to come help her take the barrette out of her hair. As I enter the bathroom, there she stands (in her a la natural) with tears streaming down her face. Don't you know what went through my mind! So, I asked why the tears.......her response......"I don't want to be eleven!" Excuse me? "I don't want to be eleven!" Why? "I just don't". Now, that is not a reason if you ask me. Very indecisive, unsure and evasive. So, we dig a little deeper, and the final answer goes like this:

Mom: Did you start your period? (I just blurted, with no sweet feeling in my voice)
Miss thing: "no, but I don't want to either." Hello...no woman in her right mind really wants to start that whole thing. Wouldn't it be nice if it didn't happen until you were ready to be a mom? No off and on switches.......talk to Eve later.
Mom: "So why the tears today?"
Miss thing: "Because life just goes by like that (a sweep of the hand and a snap of the fingers). It is gone before you know it and you missed something."
Mom: "Baby, there is nothing we can do about it. God made it that way. So, enjoy it instead of sitting around worrying, watching TV, or playing computer. Now, get in the shower and get your hair clean so you can have a worry free day tomorrow."
Ms. Thing: "And I have a uni brow, and when I tried to pluck them out they bled, and I didn't like that."
Mom: "Get in the shower and wash the uni brow and I will style it for you!"

Case closed.

Then here comes Mr.K. Not thirty minutes later, announcing that he needs his cartoon house shoes because the next day would be house shoe day. The search for the shoes immediately begins. He comes into my room and asks if I had found them yet. I sent him back to bed with the threat of "you will just have to wear mine." It was a few minutes later that I remembered I cleaned up his closet, and I remember having two sacks. One sack was for the Children's Home in another town, and the other was the sack for me to give to a dear friend for her two. So with fingers crossed I go to the garage to look in the blue sack (for said friend)for shoes. No cartoon house shoes which let me know that I had put them in the wrong bag. The wrong bag is now in a huge padlocked bin at the church. I can't go there and crawl into the bin to get the shoes, nor can I leave a note on the bin saying.."I am a horrible mom who put my son's cartoon house shoes in a sack in here, please return them ASAP (like before he wakes up in the morning.). So, I am now admitting to mother's of the world that I did the thing you think will never happen and does. You give away a toy they have not touched in 2 years, and 3 days later they ask if you have seen that toy. So..............7AM he rises to ask, "Did you find my shoes?" To which I respond, "No, but mine have dogs on them." We stuff them in his backpack and he wears them all day long. "Someone else wore his mom's shoes, but they weren't mom colors." Remember this is the child who said I "smelled saucy".
Case closed!

The newest ham in the family!

And there he is!!! Ain't he the ham? He is actually a hampshire pig. He and his owner...also a real ham... are quite the pair. This is BEVO at his best...eating. He just had a good walk, some good food, and a bath! Now, he also had a good poop.......on top of my muck boots then wiped his bottom against my pants, so he is really feeling like the top hog. He is younger than Wilbur by a couple of months, and weighs 73 lbs. He is the only thing gaining weight faster than me! He gained 11 pounds in 7 days. So, when you think about it, I'm at least doing it slowly and steadily, not pigging out! I am sure that certain Texans would not like to know that his beloved mascot is also the name for an animal who licks the pooper scooper, chews on the garden hose, and squeals like a girl!
But......this is "some pig". My son's pet! And my newest lesson in life. You see, he wouldn't mind Kauy on Saturday. We tried EVERYTHING to get him to practice his "walk" for the arena in a few weeks. We tried EVERYTHING to get him back into the pen. We finally called in the reinforcements........the grandparents. What is it about Grandparents? How is it that they can do hardly NOTHING...and everyone minds!!!! They walked in, and the next thing I know that pig is in the stall. So the lesson there? I calmly asked my children how they felt when those pigs would not do what they wanted. I asked them how they felt after trying EVERYTHING to direct those pigs to the right spot. I then with a smile on my face said...yep, you know exactly what I said don't you? I said.....Then that is how I feel when you don't mind! And yep, you know their response. "Mmmommmmmm!" And a roll of the eyes. The pigs? They were thinking "kids" and then took a roll in the poop!

Bring your Muck Boots.

Can you guess which of the muck boots belongs to "Miss Thing"? Just a wild guess which pair would only be seen on an eleven year old! YEP.. I am certain that you have guessed that the pretty pair belong to the fashion queen. Well, she is the fashion queen only in the pig stall. Today she wanted to wear a pair of shorts and a shirt that screamed "Hello, mom did NOT help me get dressed this morning!" BUT I love her!!! Yes I do!

You probably wonder the following question: Why do you need muck boots with two pigs who now own cement stalls with lighting and heat lamps? Would you please bear with me as I attempt to explain our $30.oo worth of muck boots for such a nice barn!

Where shall I start with this explanation that has been running through my mind since the day I took this photo? AND before I start.........mom, and mom H. in Arkansas....Please take no offense. I do realize the words I am about to write are the titles for things I wouldn't put in my hand much less my mouth but....................If you have never been around pigs then you have no idea about pig poop. Oh my stars................. Oh my goodness.............Oh my nose!!!

We have had chickens for several years. I have been around horses and cows for a long time. I have stepped in some serious "stuff". However, it is very obvious to me that whoever coined the word "Chickens&*%" had never stepped in pig poop! I understand that word is used by many middle schoolers to describe someone who runs away...it is a runny substance, but hello.........that word does not hold a candle to what our muck boots step in daily. You see, cows, horses, and chickens all eat natural stuff such as hay, grass, bugs and whatever else they find. Pigs.......they eat pig feed (which I have not read the ingredients list on the package yet) oats, some additives, and then they have a fondness for poop. Their poop. I am not sure if they actually eat it, but our two seem to have a fondness for cleaning off the poop scooper pitchfork.

Oh, and that isn't all. Go ahead, put your washable tennis shoes on, walk into the pig pen, feed, love, play, and then head to the house. You can smell yourself coming and going. Now, put those shoes under water and wash them. If you step in other forms of poop, it is easily cleaned off and the aroma is gone. Oh no, not pig poop. Of the 4 girls that I took to the movie....3 stepped into the stall with no muck boots. We washed shoes before going to the movies. Let me say that we should have kept the windows cracked, and nary a person sat within 5 rows in front of us. I washed my daughter's on Sunday, and the rubber sole is still "ode de pig crap!" I washed Miss Things shoes in the washer with all sorts of stuff and could still smell "ode de poo!"

As for the consistency? Chicken$&*@ may be runny, but pig poo has some real "stick-to-it-ness". It is super glue in barn yard fashion. That stuff hardens as fast as the red clay dirt we throw it on, and I don't think it dissinagrates. I think the sun turns it to a silly putty consistency. One lady told me that it will kill all the weeds around the barn. It will also kill the grass, flowers, trees, and air quality. If, just IF, it is that deadly, I wonder if companies which make ant killer would be interested in some new products. Maybe we should send it to the Gulf war? Do you have a serious enemy?

All I am saying is this............if you want to visit our pigs wear your muck boots. Like the saying goes: "The more you stir it up the more it stinks". No DUH!!!! No joking about "it's getting deep in here". It isn't deep out there..........it's just there. At the front of the stall waiting for you to step in it. The next time I hear the students use the "chicken" word, I will snicker before writing the referral. That's not an insult. Come meet the pigs......Come muck the barn! Bring your own muck boots because I ain't sharing!

And...this is my life and like this pig poo...I am sticking to it!

She turned 11

Well, I now have an 11 year old in my house! We had the movie, movie snack-pack, hamburgers by the T-man, cake, and fun. Well, it wasn't all fun and games, but we won't go there. Just let me say that I am so very thankful to the Lord that I don't have 5 girls. Better yet...I am thankful that I have one girl and one boy...end of discussion. Oh my goodness, 5 girls at various stages of hormone development spending the night under the supervision of a 72 year old and a soon to be 50 year old both of whom have fake hormones. That is not the best of situations. The 72 yr. old scared the pants off of them right after dark when she hid from them on a dark country road bathed in the light of a full moon (with pigs grunting in the background). Then around mid-night she loaded all of us (except my dad...who was not wringing his hands yet) into the suburban and headed into town. The girls (and Kauy) were the first to offer the "2008 Let the Christmas Carols begin" program to Aunt T. She was dressed appropriately in green and red. On the ride home, we told ghost stories, missed our road, performed a Chinese Fire drill (only the 72 yr. old and 49 yr. old participated.) and reenacted a few of the examples as to why you don't park on dirt roads. Hello..........where is the fun? Where was the participation? What is up with these hormonal kids? Needless to say......I was thankful for the soccer game to which I was NOT taking 4 girls (notice one is now missing.....we leave her in the barn). Of course...the 72 yr.old stayed at home and slept. Me...........well, coffee and Chocolate will move mountains!

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

April 15? That's nothing!

As I have said before, I have had this degree of "counselor" since 1991. I often asked myself "Why was someone else chosen for the counselor's job? Why was I over looked?" I don't know how many times my hopes were up, only to come crashing down. And now...I sit in an office with the sign "Counselor" outside the door and am certain that God raised me up "at the right time"; that He was comforting when He said "I know the plans I have for you"; and that for every season there is "a time".
I will never reveal who; what; when; or where, but I will tell you that in the last 3 weeks of my life (in the dreaded month of October) God has shown me "the time" was right, within "His plans" during the right season(October). Our campus is home to several students who have experienced the death of an immediate family member. Three of those students just happen (by God's design) to fall under my half of the alphabet. The other was a student of mine last year. I have done more grief counseling in the last 3 weeks than they say they do in a year. Never once did I ask "Could someone else handle this?" I met them at the door. Went to find them in their rooms and talked honestly with them. I hugged them...males and females...felt sick to my stomach with them, and promised to find them daily and check on them. We talked about the "fun" they had with their loved one, drew pictures, and discussed the fears of going home each day. Through all of that I held firm. No tears. Just me being a strong hold for them and then.............today!
Today my student 'K' came to my office with a gift and a "thank you" for helping him since loosing his father. Today.........8 years later....I lost it. Today.......a 12-year old's father came to see me. We called her in for the surprise conference where she started with the rolling of the eyes, the quick responses, and that "huffiness". At the end of the conference I looked her in the eyes and told her that she will hug her father before leaving my office. She will tell him thanks for coming and helping her out of the hole she was in and when she looked at me like I might be crazy.....I lost it! With that stupid quivering chin, I left her with the comment that my own two children will never tell their dad thank you. They won't ever have Dad come work it out because "I buried their daddy 8 years ago today". She hugged him. Thanked him. Told him she loved him. And they went home. Situation not completely solved but resolved for today.
I am not the greatest. I KNOW I am just the rookie and learning.........I don't particularly like the way God prepared me for this job. HOWEVER...He prepared me. God has placed me where I am in order to serve Him at this time in this place.
Once again my friend who said: "Don't ask why, just pray for peace" was wise! When you find yourself in the dip of the roller coaster ride, don't panic, don't sit and ask why. God will raise you up. Pray for peace! April the 15th....a piece of cake. It's only money. October 15? That's my heart!

That durn pig!

It is probably with bated breath (whatever that really and truly is) that you have been awaiting the next installment of "My Life". Ha Ha...me too! Who has time for blogging.....obviously someone who has 26 hours in a day, 9 days a week, and is very organized!
It has been a great experience to own a pig. We will now have electricity in the barn. We are having 2 of the stalls cemented with a slope for runoff water. We all three own our own muck boots (Makaley's are leopard). And...we have found out that you can sell a non-show pig for up to $1,300.00. It is amazing how much work gets done in the pig pen at the barn and not at the pig pen in our house. It is amazing how much squealing can go on in the barn. Let me give you an example.
Last Thursday we were all very calmly hanging out in the barn enjoying the flies and fresh aroma of pig poop. It was a "not to hot" afternoon, and the kids had just finished the chores in the barn. (I use that term loosely since the barn is more like a nicely-covered, 4 dirt floor stalls with a runway down the center of the barn.) My precious, very stubborn daughter convinced me to allow her the opportunity to walk Wilbur around and show me how well she can do this activity. We barricaded the gate to the field with another pig panel and our stealthy scary looking bodies! Makaley begin the walking process. About the time she gets down the runway and closer to the gate, the wind blew the wrong direction or Wilbur just saw freedom, but that ding-dang pig flew over the little pig panel right through the bars of the gate to freedom. Now, let me say here that if you lived where people kept your food bucket full, water at your beck and call AND cool red mud to just lay in....wouldn't you stay put? Nope this pig jumped and ran. Well, the daughter begin crying and screaming for someone to do something...the son started squealing while standing with his fingers in his ears...I was TRYING to tell them to stay calm but having to scream over the ruckus, AND the "man"...well, he tackled the pig and that thing started in on the squealing too! Nothing but squealing! Every breath of air was squealing. I still have a headache.
It is also amazing how you begin to look like your animal. Once at the soccer field we saw a lady with a certain type of dog. My son told my daughter "hey they look alike. She must have gotten him from the Barkery!" Yesterday I walked into the barn with two very clean children. Wilbur had been digging for hours in the mud from the rain. My son was concerned that "he didn't get out the gate so do you think he is working on another escape passage?" I left them to chores while I walked off the frustration of not having my computer at school (long story). I returned to find a filthy red pig, and two children who looked about the same. I found that funny but not as funny as when Kauy walked Wilbur on Sat. night and Makaley said to the whole crew: "Look, he has the same swing in his hips as mom does.".........On that thought I may decide to play in the red mud.